How to Stop Conflict in Relationships

by EFER41

Posted by EFER41

Video Image 01 24 e1359086042865 How to Stop Conflict in Relationships %Category

Hi, There!

Today I want to share with you a bit of what I shared last week on an interview I participated. I believe this information is important because it can benefit most women I know.

I was asked, Can you tell us, What might be the number one thing a woman can do to deal with the conflict in her relationship?

I really believe this is a great question.

In the moment we are living we have very short attention spans mostly because everything is happening too fast. We are on the internet, we are texting, we are communicating, all this at speeds never ever dreamed of before, and everyone is looking for the golden nuggets… so I thought I would share this one with you.

The number one thing you can do right now to deal with your relationship conflict, and with any conflict for that matter, is to STOP BLAMING THE OTHER… Stop blaming the other part… whether that “other” is your partner, your children, your boss, your parents, your friends; WHOEVER it is.. STOP, just STOP….

Watch the video Below to get more on this topic:

Many times my clients say “Well yes, but they did this and they did that”…I am telling you… No matter what happened, STOP blaming and start taking responsibility.

I believe every woman, every person, must take responsibility for the results they are getting in their lives. It is not about what somebody else does or doesn’t do… It is about what YOU are willing to do to get what you truly want.


It is about asking yourself how willing you are to do the things that need to be done to experience what you truly want in your life.

For example… a client once told me, “I have no time to dedicate to my business because my mother does not support me, I Need her to take care of my children so I can have time to build my business.”

This client was experiencing resentment and blame because she truly believed it was her mother’s fault that her business was unsuccessful.

When worked through this, she had the conversation she needed to have, first with herself and then with her mom.

She took responsibility for finding the help she needed somewhere else, and she made sure it was a proper arrangement for both parties… The truth is her mother was doing the best she could do at that moment, and it was about my client looking for a different solution to her problem, instead of staying stuck in the resentment towards her mom.

In the moment the resentment towards her mother stopped, in the moment in which the problem stopped being the lack of support from her mother” and she saw the real problem, which was finding a good person who can help her take care of her kids so she could work.

Right there she was able to dedicate her energy to look for this person, instead of dedicating her energy to be in conflict with her mother, and thus, when she solved the real problem, she was able to find more time for what she needed to do.

You don’t have the right to ask someone else to change something just so you can feel better, or do what you want to do, or go where you want to go… the focus needs to be on what YOU can do.

Take responsibility for what you want, get the guts to make the decisions that need to be made to get there, and then TAKE ACTION. Go do what you need to do and want you truly want to do, without blaming anyone else.

Here’s today’s tweetable.

No one has the right to ask you to change so they can feel better or be happier, that is selfishness not love. @Erika_Ferenczi

In the comments below, let me know…

How would your focus change if the problem was not what someone else is not doing for you, but what you need to do for yourself?

Who is the first person you will stop blaming right now for what you do not have?

And most important, what will you DO, so you can have and experience what you truly desire to have?

Be as specific as possible. Not only will it help you take action, but also will bring clarity of what you need to do to support your life!

Now, go do that and I will see very soon.

Until next time.
All my Love
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Saravanan April 11, 2013 at 1:56 pm

This is really true. First of all I will take responsibility and do my work as you said in this article.

I thank god that I came across this article from some other thing which I was searching for.

Reply

Erika Ferenczi April 11, 2013 at 8:24 pm

That is the first step always, take responsibility for your part and then start from there. I am happy it helped you.

Reply

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